The Best Anniversary Gift I Ever Received

After courting for three years, including surviving a year-long long distance relationship between Maine and Okinawa, I married my best friend. That was nineteen years ago! I can hardly believe its been nineteen years!

Two and half years into our marriage we welcomed our first child, a son.

Two years later we were blessed with another child, another son!

These two boys have become my driving force to my life's purpose in raising them up to be men of God, strong, and of good character. Phew! It's not easy! The tempers can flare (mine more often than theirs). I fitfully surrendered my plans for my life and dug in deep to God's promises for my kids. I took them home and began homeschooling them. You can read more about that here.

These two boys it seems have always been together!

And we have welcomed four more children since these first two boys joined our family!

My three boys!

Then we were blessed with our first daughter!

And a second daughter!

And a fourth son!

But back to my big boys and the reason for this post!

They are not so little any more.

My time at home homeschooling them is almost over.

They are growing up!

The oldest has his license now and drives himself and his brother to their JROTC class two days a week.

In this class they learn wonderful things about our country, good citizenship, reaching out to our Veterans, and the value of community service. They write speeches and essays on the military. They wear uniforms and learn to appreciate all our military does to protect our freedoms.

And occasionally, they get to go out to lunch. They are homeschooled so they are free to leave school after their class and grab a sandwich and return later in the day for outside activities. They bring their homeschool work I have sent along with them to do.

If you've ever heard the saying that "having children is to have your heart go walking around OUTSIDE your body", well, I have never felt this to be more true than now. These boys are my world, and yet they are not mine. They are God's. But the best anniversary gift I could have ever received was when they came home last night after their whirlwind of an activity filled day and told me that the lady at the sandwich shop where they were getting their lunch said to them, 

"School's out for the day already?"

"No, we're homeschooled." they replied.

She then went on to ask if they had other siblings and if they too were homeschooled.

They told her.

Then my son told me that the lady said to be sure and tell me...

"that I was doing a good job and I should keep up the good work"!

The best gift I could have ever received on my 19th  anniversary, was some simple, kind words from a stranger who saw a good work being completed in my children. And I am in awe, and give God all the glory! For it is by His grace I have been saved and by faith I continue this race to run it well and complete the task the Lord has set before me. A little bit of encouragement goes a looong way. The Lord encouraged me today through the very blessings I am working so hard at home to raise! I will continue to roll up my sleeves, die to self, and get to work. To not just be a hearer, but a doer for God's Kingdom. For I have at LEAST nineteen more years to go!

Do you have some simple, kind words for a weary mom today? Don't hold back. You words just might be exactly what she needs to hear to carry her for a very long time!

"The right word at the right time

    is like a custom-made piece of jewelry" Proverbs 25:11

I can't wait to share how this verse ties into my life right now!

Here is a sneak peak!

Growing Great Kids By Kate Battistelli-My Review

When I first joined the CWA Review Crew, one of the first book titles that jumped out at me was this book by Kate Battistelli, called Growing Great Kids. The title indeed caught my eye at first, but it was the subtitle that made me sign up to review it, "Partnering with GOD to cultivate His purpose in your child's life". As a mother of six children ranging in age from 16 to 6 months I am always on the look out for great reads to help me be a better mom to my blessings! When the book finally arrived I was really excited to begin, until I shared it with a couple of friends. They were skeptical. "Growing Great Kids? How does this woman think she can write a book on growing great kids when she only had ONE daughter who just happens to be the one and only Dove Award-winning, Grammy-nominated recording artist, Francesca Battistelli?"

 Okay, those weren't their EXACT words but I knew what they were thinking. I was thinking it too...I've even been found saying this a time or two...
"Back when I only had ONE child I was certain that I was THE perfect parent! Thank the Lord my second son came along to put me in my place!"
Raising children is not easy, but raising only one child is A LOT easier. You have more time to devote to that one life. I have to share myself with seven other souls (including my husband). Well, if you are like me, thinking what does this Kate Battistelli have to teach me about growing great kids because she only had one child?, then you would be WRONG. I thoroughly enjoyed this book!

Kate Battistelli offers wonderful insight, humor, and inspiration to dream big dreams for each one of the children God has gifted us with. She explains, "Successful adults don't happen by accident. It takes wisdom to raise your children with a strong sense of their destiny in God and a deep knowledge of their gifts and callings".

 I really enjoyed how Kate wove stories of raising her daughter Francesca to become the amazing Christian singer she is today to share her points in growing great kids. She even shares some of the stories behind her daughter's songs that came from real life incidents where Francesca learned some life lessons. "Got a couple dents in my fender..." I was impressed how much Kate would press in and pray for specific things for her daughter, including for her daughter to win a Dove award and Grammy nominations. She covered her daughter in prayer! When Kate needs more support for her advice she relies heavily on quotes from friends who parented more than one child. This makes for a wonderful read as she reveals her own shortcomings and failures and becomes very vulnerable with the reader even as she encourages us to dig in deeper and do the hard task of raising up kids for God's kingdom. She quotes many scripture verses, but I loved this particularly, 1 Corinthians 15:58 "Therefore, my beloved brethren, be firm (steadfast), immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord [always being superior, excelling, doing more than enough in the service of the Lord], knowing and being continually aware that your labor in the Lord is not futile [it is never wasted or to no purpose]."

My favorite chapters were "Gifts and Callings", "The Power of a Parent's Words", "Prayer, the Essential Ingredient", and "Common Parenting Traps". If you are looking for a wonderful parenting book to inspire you to be a better parent in order to grow great kids you need to own this book! Kate has written prayers at the end of each chapter to pray for our kids. They are, in my opinion, worth every penny of this book. She has inspired me to get a notebook and to begin praying BIG dreams for my own children, to be diligent in prayer, purposeful, specific, relentless, ever pursuing God's calling, seeking after God with all my heart for my kids! You can purchase your own copy over at Amazon or Barnes and Noble ISBN: 967-1-61638-654-2 | List Price: $14.99 | Format: Softcover | Page Count: 238

Here is Kate's interview talking about her book.

 Disclosure:  I received a free copy of this book/Ebook/Product to review. I was not required to write a positive review nor was I compensated in any other way. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the FTC Regulations. I am part of The CWA Review Crew.

"Mostly clean" or "Mostly dirty", It's All In The Perspective!

I thought we were done unpacking from our vacation. I found this backpack on the floor yesterday though.

It belongs to my 14 year old son. I asked him, "Is there any dirty laundry in that bag because I'm trying to wash another load?"

He replied, "well, they're mostly clean or I guess they're mostly dirty now."

I give him a big smirky grin with a question mark wrapped up inside. He is great at giving me these types of answers.

 ""Mostly clean" or "mostly dirty", huh? Which is it?" I ask.

"Mommy, (yes, he still calls me "Mommy") you know at camp we wear our clothes more than once, so those are my clothes that I wore, so they're dirty, but they're in there because they're mostly clean. But now we're home, yeah, they need to be washed, so they're mostly dirty!" He gives me a big sheepish smile and shrug of his shoulders. 

What more explanation does a mom need?

He told me the truth. 

The clothes ARE mostly clean...

and yet mostly dirty.

I thought later, isn't that like our Christian walk with God. We get up in the morning with a fresh air of expectation for the new day. "Today I'm going to be a better listener!" As I go about the day, taking time to listen to each of my children, it becomes more work than fun. I begin to slip into the place where I am "mostly clean" in my own good intentions, but I am still "mostly dirty", acting without thinking out of selfishness and quick, thoughtless remarks that cut my children's souls to pieces.

So I seek God's forgiveness and ask Him to make me clean. I don't want to be "mostly clean", and especially not "mostly dirty". I don't think God likes fence sitters. I am reminded how God spoke to His church in Laodicea, it is written in Revelation 3:15-16;

 "I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either one or the other! So, because you are lukewarm—neither hot nor cold—I am about to spit you out of my mouth.

So I'm soaking up the truths of God's Word. Learning some great stuff on humility and being a "bridge builder" for a new Christian friend of mine. Praying HARD for new direction for my husband, reading a book on "Growing Great Kids" (review to follow soon), and just trying to soak up all the moments I have with my kids while they are still mine to care for, including washing the dirty laundry (that's both "mostly clean" and "mostly dirty" at the same time!). It's all in the perspective!

Here is my son at camp showing off his bird he is training!

I love this kid!

Another Chapter Is Ending

A moment to reflect.

My oldest son is in high school.

My days of driving him to his JROTC class are now over.

The long hours of waiting for big brother's class to end are over.

We don't have to put our feet up.

And share in the van while we wait for class to end.

Pausing to play with the baby, who will be grown up himself all too soon.

Yet these are the days...

and the moments...

we cherish.

Next fall my son will drive himself, along with his younger brother to their one class at public school. We will continue to homeschool through high school. Two boys in high school. Where has the time gone? Weren't they just little boys yesterday?

But they are becoming men. This is what I have been preparing them for since they were born.

Another chapter is ending. It is all good.

Thoughts on Memorial Day

War is real. Today we set aside this day called, "Memorial Day" to pause and remember and HONOR all those who have gone before us, who proudly served our country and paid the highest price.

It was originally called, "Decoration Day", as a way of honoring those brave souls who laid down their lives in service for our country. In 1873, New York became the first state to recognize this as a National holiday. Soon other states followed. Eventually Congress enacted a law, The National Holiday Act of 1971, which placed this holiday on the last Monday in May.

Here is my own hero. I got to pin his new badge on his uniform. We were so young. This was taken in 1995 I believe. I'm so proud of my Marine. God has truly blessed me with a great man to walk out this life with.

(We have six kids now,--giggle and giddy smile here--I can hardly believe it!)

So many of the fallen heroes we honor today were so young. Many left behind wives and small children while still many others never got a chance to get married and have children. Their lives were cut short. So young. What a great sacrifice! Freedom for our country! 

But Freedom isn't FREE.

It comes at a price.

It takes hard work and dedication and sacrifice.

Here are my guys at Parris Island watching recruits learn how to march.

As we raise these sons, who are we putting before them to look to? As mothers of sons, we need to do the hard things, stay dedicated to our families, and sacrifice our time and lives for our families.

Let's not live lives defeated. Let's live in Victory Lane!

There is a man who went before us, a God man. He came to not only show us how to live in relationship with others, he came to set us FREE.

Freedom from all that drags us down, torments our souls, and wages war in our hearts! Freedom from depression, anxiety, wrong teachings, addictions, powerlessness, shame, hurt, FEAR, rejection, sickness, unforgiveness, torment...

You name it, Jesus came to claim it...

Photo credit

and set our hearts and souls free!

For there is a war raging in every one of us. A war for our hearts and souls. 

War is real.

 The enemy doesn't create, he plagiarizes. He uses all the fancy stuff, maybe some grand, flashing lights. I know you've seen him. He is never far away. Pleasure Island is always ready to entice us to a life of fun, fancy, and fullfillment. Acts so seemingly innocent at first but enticing us away to commit larger offences, all in the face of no recrimination. Pinocchio knew this place. 

Where are we allowing our boys to wander today?

Russell Moore wrote a great article on this very topic. Titled, "Fake Love, Fake War" he gives his thoughts on the book, The Demise of Guys and lays hold of the truths of the war that our enemy is really waging. 

God calls us to do His will. What is His will concerning our sanctification?

 Paul writes to us in 1 Thessalonians 4:3-8, "It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; 4 that each of you should learn to control your own body[a] in a way that is holy and honorable, 5 not in passionate lust like the pagans, who do not know God; 6 and that in this matter no one should wrong or take advantage of a brother or sister.[b] The Lord will punish all those who commit such sins, as we told you and warned you before. 7 For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life. 8 Therefore, anyone who rejects this instruction does not reject a human being but God, the very God who gives you his Holy Spirit."

I urge all you mothers of sons to learn more about these areas that are being put before our sons. Be watchful, be ever on guard. Remember that the enemy is out to destroy all of us. He is not your friend.

Freedom is at hand. We know who wins the battle. Go and live today and remember all those who sacrificed their lives for our country. Remember too HE who sacrificed his own Life and Blood for our souls.

Grab your kids, find a parade. Clap and be thankful for those who march today in memory of the fallen. My son will be among the marching feet. He is a good boy. 

with a long history of family who served our country before him.

Here is his great-grandfather on my husband's side.

Here is his great-grandfather on my father's side.

Here is his great-grandfather on my mother's side.

Here is his grandfather on my husband's side

Here is his grandfather on my side

Here is his father-my husband

We thank them all for their service!

But even he, my son, is at war. I pray a mother's prayer that my son would never have to fight in battle for our country, even knowing he was born into a war that was started in a beautiful Garden. We will be victorious!

Happy Memorial Day! Thank a Veteran today!

Baby Boy is Here! The Birth of Little Warrior, Our 6th Baby

Here we are on delivery day, January 5th, 2012!
Our 6th baby (3rd tubal reversal baby) was born by my 6th c-section weighing in at 5 lbs. 10 oz., 19 inches long. Just a little peanut! Welcome Wyatt James!

I had been having a lot of contractions this pregnancy. My doctor suggested some medication to control the contractions and help my uterus relax a little. She said my uterus was probably "irritated" from having carried so many babies. The medicine definitely slowed the contractions and I tried to stay off my feet. Easier said than done when you're homeschooling three children while chasing a toddler and preschooler!
The last two months of my pregnancy my doctor monitored my uterus closely around my prior incision sites. The uterus appeared to be very thin in places and since I was carrying this baby so LOW it put extra pressure on my scar tissues. There were very real concerns for a uterine rupture. Through lots of prayer and rest along with a medication to slow contractions, I was able to deliver a healthy baby boy on my scheduled c-section date, just 11 days after Christmas!

My birth story wouldn't be complete without mentioning that my doctor was trying to convince me to have yet ANOTHER tubal ligation before delivering! She feared for this baby and for future pregnancies. I verbally consented that after my doctor opened me up and saw a very thin uterus I would consent to the tubal ligation and not have to worry about risking my own health for a future pregnancy. My nurse whom we had gotten to know quite well while we were waiting for my surgery stepped in at the last second and cautioned me to NOT sign anything until my doctor put it into WRITING what we had verbally consented to. My nurse could sense I was unsure about the tubal ligation option and she wanted it in writing. As my doctor came in we discussed the written instructions and I did consent to a tubal ligation if and ONLY IF there appeared to be minimal amount of uterus lining and putting my health and a future pregnancy at risk.
As my doctor began opening me up and before she had even delivered little Wyatt into my arms, she stopped, looked over the curtain, and told me that my insides were beautiful (again, she told me this last time too). She said there appeared to be plenty of uterus with only minimal scarring and whatever was seen on ultrasound was not evident at delivery! (Miracle?) I lay there and settled back into my "happy place" (where I let my mind wander over to the things of God and Heaven and Jesus dying on the cross for my own life as I lay there arms out stretched offering my life for the life of my infant son.) My door of fertility remains open, to whatever God has planned for our family!
"He blessed them, and their numbers greatly increased, and increased their families like flocks." Psalm 107: 38,41

Here he is getting his first finger prints by his Daddy. My husband finger prints people as part of his job as a police officer and he said that this was his smallest finger print detail yet!

Here are a few of his biggest fans!

Our oldest son holding our youngest son! (He was born breech and started this whole process of being born by c-section!)

Our second oldest son (He was born by emergency c-section after going into distress from a failed version-he was breech too!)

Our third son. (He was born head down, but we opted for a c-section with tubal ligation with his birth).

Our first daughter AFTER our tubal reversal! She is in awe of her new baby brother! (I went to a high risk doctor but noone was willing to let me risk a v-back delivery, so I had c-section number 4!)

Our youngest daughter, second tubal reversal baby, holding Wyatt. She loves him "sooo much"! (also born by c-section)

Here is little Wyatt so happy to be home! He clasped his fingers together and thanked the Lord he could be home with his family! But that was short lived...his bilirubin levels skyrocketed...

And back to the hospital we went! It was very emotional for me after working so hard to come home from the hospital to have to go back in. This time we went to a smaller hospital and one of my friends was working on shift that day. She stayed late to get our room set up and settle us in for the evening. She really put me at ease and took such great care of Wyatt and me!

We are so in love with this new little life!

We all couldn't be happier that Wyatt is finally  here!